Approaching Half Way

My first chemo infusion I came ready for battle.  I had my Fuck Cancer shirt on, I ate Dicks with abandon and repeated my mantra, ‘you got this’.  Number four is right around the corner and I’ve lost a little bit of my spunk.  I still repeat my mantra and flip the bird to cancer daily, but I can’t fathom ever eating another Dicks cheeseburger again and the mere thought of the infusion ward makes my mouth water with nausea.  I receive chemo every other Tuesday and the first week is typically filled with body aches, nausea, headaches and an overall feeling of ick.  The feel good week following I feel more like myself (just a tired version) and can almost get excited about another infusion because that means one more down.  I’m on a feel good week now and next Tuesday is half way, 4 out of 8 done!  In addition, it’s the end of the Adriamycin/Cytoxan cocktail.  The following 4 will be Taxol, which I hear isn’t quite as bad….we’ll see.

Two days after my second infusion, exactly when my oncologist said it would, my hair started falling out.  I could run my fingers through my hair and my and pull out handfuls.  Perhaps at a different time in my life or if I was going through this decades ago the hair loss would be an issue for me.  I think the empowering photos of bald confident women kicking breast cancers ass (and Charlize Theron in Mad Max) made the hair loss for me a non-issue.  I kind of like it.  Not that the buzz cut is staying or anything but I don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed of my new do at all.

The night of the shaving.  Face Timing with your best friend, as you do.
Casey did a pretty good job!
Someone else got a haircut too.  Unlike his Mom, he was pissed about it.


About The Neuzel Project

Neuzel is the combination of Neuman and Benzel. Now that Casey and I have been married for 3 years, we could probably be the Neuman Project, but I still love the time we were the Neuzels so it will remain.
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1 Response to Approaching Half Way

  1. zuger says:

    You’re the badass-est woman I know.

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